What two Oktoberfests taught me about Munich's beer festival

When I announced that I was moving to Germany for my higher studies, the response I heard most often was that I was going to a country where beer costs less than water. Everyone knew about Oktoberfest, which is held in late September each year. I was excited about all of it: studying abroad, meeting people, learning a culture, and eating and drinking my way through whatever festivals came my way. After my first year I went to Munich with friends for Oktoberfest, and I have now been twice, with some wonderful and some deeply frustrating days behind me. These are the things I would tell anyone going for the first time.

What actually happens

The festival runs for 16 to 18 days and has been held since 1810, which says something about how deeply it sits in Bavarian culture. It opens with a parade through the city streets, after which the Mayor taps the first beer barrel, the signal for everything to begin. A second, colourful parade follows the next day, with different German regions and traditions represented alongside other European countries.

In 2016 the dates were 17 September to 3 October. Each day has its own programme, all of it listed on the official Oktoberfest website.

The heart of it is the tents, each tied to a different brewery and each seating several thousand people. Finding a seat is the hard part, and without a reservation you should expect a long wait.

Where to go and what to drink

You can spend an entire day at Theresienwiese, the festival ground, reached on metro lines U4 or U5. There may be as many as 14 tents, each pouring a different brand, with food sold inside them and out on the grounds. Beer comes in one-litre jugs at around 10 euros, and there is no reason to hurry it. Bands play in the tents and variety acts turn up; when somebody nearby starts a cheer or a song, the whole room joins in.

Outside, there are rides and rows of stalls for games, souvenirs and traditional dress. If you get the chance, order Augustiner: it is one of the oldest breweries in Bavaria.

Getting a seat without a booking

Bookings are not compulsory, and I have never made one, though I would next time. Opening weekend is the one to avoid if you are unbooked. The crowds are enormous, and unless you have reserved, getting inside a tent is a lottery. Reservations go through the individual tents, whose details are on the official site; Munichs Oktoberfest also lists accommodation, tent reservations and related information.

Without a booking, arrive early in the morning, before the tents open at 10 am, and preferably on a weekday; that is the surest way to find seats. The alternative is queueing, with no guarantee of how long you will stand there or whether you will get in at all. I have watched people wait 45 minutes, two hours and longer.

Dress the part

Wear the traditional clothes if you can: a Dirndl for women, Lederhosen for men. Locals notice and appreciate it. Dirndls are sold in shops all over Munich, including at the central station and at the festival itself, but prices drop in sales at stores such as New Yorker in the weeks before the festival.

Eating, and what to do if you cannot get in

Order beer with sausages, or pretzels and dumplings if you are vegetarian, and let the noise carry you along. If the tents are full, do not despair. Walk the grounds, soak up the atmosphere, and buy Oktoberfest beer and hats from the stalls outside the grounds instead.

If the scale of it all sounds too much, the Volksfest in Stuttgart is a quieter alternative. And if you are planning around Oktoberfest, Cologne Carnival or Basel Fasnacht, this collection of festival and carnival hacks is worth reading first.

Tell me if you are heading to a festival soon, and share this with anyone planning their first Oktoberfest.